I am never going to feel the validation of those I’ve craved validation from. That’s precisely why I crave their validation, in its absence, it’s become a longed for an imagined ideal, an ideal that can no longer realistically be met or even be recognized when it’s earned. An artifact of neglect and ambivalence it motivates without fulfillment or cessation. A make believe artist with a piece of charcoal and a blank sheet of paper.
I am free to dream anything.